"You say it's your birthday..."

It's my birthday too--yeah
They say it's your birthday
We're gonna have a good time
I'm glad it's your birthday
Happy birthday to you."

:-)

Happy Father's Day/Anniversary!

Yesterday was my parent's 28th anniversary (yeah, I don't how they stayed married this long either) and today of course is Father's Day. So in a while I'll be marching over to my parent's with both kinds of presents and cards in tow. :-)

I love my parents and appreciate all the sacrifices they made in raising our family. I think they're both unique, good hearted people that made my sister and me the people we are today. I love them both so much. <3

Also Happy Father's Day to all the Daddies out there as well!

Taking Emotional Stock

Things are going well and I'm in a much better mood. My sister spent the night last night and we caught up and gabbed properly. Things are good with her and her new boyfriend (Yay! My sister's dating someone!), things are going well at her job and life is treating her well. To be honest, hearing all these good things about my sister totally brightened my mood, I'm still the big sister after all and want the best for my little sis. So when she's happy, I am happy. :-)

On the job front, as some people know already, someone may make an honest woman out of me. ;-) We touched on the subject since he brought it up first, so we'll see what happens next.

Money-wise, meh. It could be better, but I'm slowly getting things balanced and organized. There was an annual fee on one of my credit cards that came up unexpectedly, but it will get paid like normal soon, just need to wait a little while longer. #1 order of business when I get settled is to pay off my little credit cards. I'm sick and tired of having them and having weird fees and shenanigans get tacked on unexpectedly. *grumble*

Relationship front, :-). Friends front, yay varily!

So overall, things are good; definitely above "meh," but not exactly "yay" and definitely not "YAY!" So I am happy.

Grinding My Gears

I'm having major focusing problems today. I can tell because when I was getting down to work yesterday I was sailing through it like old times and wasn't even getting distracted by Twitter or Facebook shenanigans. I know what the difference is today though as I sit at my kitchen table and eat a toasted PB&J while I reflect on why my mind keeps going over certain things. I'm becoming an "adult" and it's kind of freaking me out a little.

What I mean is that it's not necessarily stuff going on in me that somehow makes me an "adult" now that's making me unsettled, it's seeing how other people react to me and treat me that is causing me to feel a little weird. It could be that since I'm getting back on my feet again and am rejoining the economy in a way that maybe I'm losing that youthful vulnerability I had gained when I got laid off. And by that I mean getting laid off knocked me down a couple pegs and back down to the mentality and demeanor of a struggling college kid again.

People were really nice to me wherever I went without knowing anything about me, people were a bit more helpful and open (maybe the whiff of defeat mixed with new ambition helped out with that, who knows), but now things have started to drop off a little and two particular things are really kind of messing with me a little.

I went to this festival today for lunch where I met up with a friend of mine. We were standing in line to get some pizza and one of the pizza staff was handing out paper plates to all the people waiting in line. Now, I overheard the guy ahead of me request a bunch of plates and the pizza staff guy said "how many, 6, 7...what?" He then handed him his plates. It's my turn next and I said nicely "oh, just one for me." As I make a grab for the plate he's giving me, he continues to hold it and tugs back a little and then says "well that's all I was going to give you anyway, I don't know what you were thinking."

Now you can say that that was the guy messing with me a little or flirting maybe, but that kind of hurt a little. I laughed it off at the time, but in my head I was like "f*ck you dude, I was just trying to be cordial, and if that was your attempt at becoming a comedian I suggest you keep your pizza day job." *grumble*

The second thing that's still rattling around in my head is what happened last night when I went to go visit a friend's studio. His studio is in a building with other artists and they were having an open house, so you can mill around, have a drink or two and get to expose yourself to different types of artwork. Everyone was pretty cool, but I did notice everyone started out very standoffish to me. Not making any eye contact, not responding to anything I asked or said, even after offering praise to one of them concerning their artwork I just got blank stares. I guess saying "wow, I really like your stuff" was not the "cool" thing to say. *grumble*

Then, one artist started playing The Downward Spiral which honestly did go along well with his type of deconstructionist art even though it did seem a bit odd to start playing it at that moment of time. I guess they are just THAT angsty and rebellious, so angsty and rebellious that when I asked them about their interest in NIN, they were just too cool for school to answer me and actually made fun of me that I knew some things about the music and the band. I apparently was "kind of creepy." I'm sorry if it's "creepy" to try to start a conversation with people that may have a shared interest in something with me. I guess all conversations should start with praise to you followed immediately by how awesome I think you are, then followed by if you would like some beer or weed or something like that. I guess I did not get the new hipsters memo in the mail regarding how to properly greet an "artist."

Listen, I think your art is fabulous, I really do. But boyo, you need to get just a little bit more exposure first before you start playing the celebrity card. And even then, what is it to be cordial to people looking at your art for the first time? I know Andy Warhol and Keith Harring weren't exactly PC, but they were at least cordial to people visiting their studios. Basquiat used to sell his work in order to pay rent for Christ's sake, so don't get too holier than though newbie.

So yeah, I'm a little raw as to how I'm getting treated by some people. It could be just me, maybe I'm cranky today and giving off a weird vibe of "please treat me like an asshole," but it still hurts. Especially when you appreciate art and new artists in general and were just trying to get exposed to new things in order to spawn some creativity on your end.

I am not your emotional punching bag, OK. Don't project your feelings of inadequacy and mediocraty onto me just because you see me as a "square" or someone that just wouldn't understand. Never judge a book by it's cover; you have no idea of my struggles and abilities or interests so instead of putting me down because it makes you feel better or cooler, maybe we can talk and get to know one another and broaden each other's horizons a little.

Epic PA Roadtrip: 6/9-6/11

All I can say to sum up is I now know why people accuse the tri-state area of having crazy drivers because after I slipped back into my neck of the woods I had to get reacquainted to speeding, passing people at top speed and crazy exits that are 4 lanes away at a distance of 100 feet.

The Pennsylvania Turnpike was such an experience in itself, it really became a main part of my vacation. Even though some portions were heavily monitored by speed cops, most of it is not and that is a very cool thing when the speed limit is set at a nice 65 mph. The turnpike is nice and wide open, you have the beautiful mountain views of Pennsylvania in the distance and, most importantly and why it took some reacclimation getting back home, the drivers are SO nice out there! Everyone followed the Audubon rules of driving, pass on the left, drive on the right. Way was always given to faster drivers and there was no such thing as stop and go traffic. The most that happened was that as you approach Pittsburg, there was some congestion getting down the hill, but they had a sign that told you about it! OMG a congestion sign! Really?!

Another great amenity, besides smooth driving, were the epic roadside service plazas. They were all recently constructed and impeccably designed and maintained. The bathrooms were clean, the food was great and they even had little doggie parks around so that your dogs could stretch their legs. :-)

So on to the main reason for the trip: visiting with friends from Buffalo and seeing my last NIN concert ever. We all met at a great hotel in Coraopolis, PA (somewhere just outside of the Post Gazette Pavilion in Burgettstown). We meet, we get acquainted again, we hug, then it was off to the venue for NIN shenanigans and such. Really dug Street Sweeper Social Club, featuring Tom Morello on guitars. NIN was awesome as usual and this concert was a fitting end to my touring rein, well done. Then Jane's Addiction ended the night with an epic set that reminded me of my youth growing up in the 90's. It was great to hear them play songs I had only heard on the radio or seen videos of, a really nice feeling.

Since we all ended up meeting in PA, there was no sojourn to Buffalo or the Adirondacks. That will be for another time and another road trip in the future. But it did make my trip back even easier and nicer since I was able to visit people and see things that I didn't have time for while driving out the first time, so it was all good. I got to meet up with my friends dotted throughout PA, Lorena in Philly, Mel and Matt kayaking somewhere on the Towpath Park.

Also, while in Pittsburgh I made it a point to check out the Warhol museum. Growing up, I never really "got" what he was trying to convey, but in my 20's I had a breakthrough and I now enjoy his art and others like his immensely. I think you need to do some living first and need to be exposed to the plastic parts of society first before you get what Andy is conveying/making fun of/commenting on/playing around with.

The later part of his life, he became great friends/art partners with Jean-Michel Basquiat, who is another absolute favorite of mine. A great feature of this museum is that it featured their joint works together which I believe is something Andy would have wanted. It was a pleasure seeing their work together and you can see how well they collaborated on a shared vision. Such a great time and worth the price of admission ($15, grumble grumble).